Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize