I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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