I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Randomize
