and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
