I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
