and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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