I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
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