no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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