But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
