Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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