I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
