Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
We had to coat check the pizza.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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