I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
