Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
