Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
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I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
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First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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