I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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