I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Randomize
