the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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