lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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