i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize