At least make sure they are 18
Why
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
