Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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