I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My feet surprised me
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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