I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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