Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
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Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality