would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize