I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
