i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
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