Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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