all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
