But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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