Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
