i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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