I'm jealous of your bromance
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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