Plan B is the new Plan A
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
