Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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