I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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