This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
