The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
it glows. i had to have it.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize
