how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Im part way to drunk.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
