I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize