I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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