The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
