No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I'm always down for nudity.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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