you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
