oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
