I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize