Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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