She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
