Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
